Digital Slave

The last 72+ hours have changed my life.  How, you ask?  I finally crossed over into the digital world and accepted digital cable with a DVR into my life.  Now, a new slave to the digital world has been born.  I cannot even fathom what my life was like on Sunday before we installed this function into our lives.  Not only do we now have 800 more cable channels, including Oxygen where my favorite "Inhale" yoga program runs, but we also have the ability to record any program we want without searching for a blank tape to record on.  Our collection of tapes labeled "Anything" will soon dwindle away and be out in the trash like the basic cable we used to have. 

 

I realized the full functionality of having a DVR while watching a show on roller coasters.  Patrick happened to be BBQing dinner at the time it was on, and I urged him to come into the room to see this particular ride.  "HURRY!", I said, as if the world was going to end if he missed it.  He made it to the room just as it was over, missing the part I so desperately wanted him to see.  "Shoot!", I said in a huff, thinking how awesome it would have been for him to witness the fury this coaster gave it's riders.  All of the sudden, it was like a light went off in my head, and I swear I heard the "ding" as it came on, just like in the cartoons.  "OH-MY-GOSH...you CAN see it because I can REWIND LIVE TV!!!"  That moment changed my life forever.

 

Now I can record my favorite fitness programs and do them in the morning before work, thus eliminating the need to travel to the gym and fight for a cardio machine.  We can record weekly shows while we're out and about, and come back to watch them whenever we please.  We can rewind "time" and then fast forward through the mind numbing commercials that plague our favorite shows. 

 

How in the world did I ever live without this thing?  It's the "Cell Phone Effect", as I like to call it.  New things are brought into your lives and after a while you wonder how it was you ever managed your crazy life without them.  Computers, Cell Phones, Palm Pilots, iPods, and DVRs, what was your life like without them?

New Monogamy?

Bored at work this morning, I was perusing MSN when I happened upon an article entitled "The New Monogamy".  I considered what this statement meant and curiosity got the best of me, so I clicked the link.  After my jaw hit the desk, I was able to finish reading the article.  To sum it up, "The New Monogamy" is where married couples set new bounds and rules to their relationships so that "agreed upon" cheating is okay and helped to keep their partners from straying otherwise.  No, I am not kidding.  There are actually people out there who do this. 

 

Could you even imagine setting up "rules" for your spouse that allowed them to physically interact with another human on a sexual level, without consequences?  Doesn't that completely traipse all over the word "monogamy"?  Monogamy is defined as "marriage to one person", or "having one sexual partner".  Mono = one.  Where is the double meaning word that allows for you and your spouse to run around town doing what was "within the rules" with whomever you please?  In my world, we call that dating and not marriage.

 

To quote a part of the article, Cathi Hanauer, an author, states:

 

"We already know that monogamous marriage is far from a raging success in this country.  In my opinion, if some couples want to try veering slightly from the contract by creating their own rules, more power to them. I commend their courage in thinking deeply about marriage and its shortcomings, and for having the creativity and guts to adjust it to fit their mutual needs."

 

Monogamous marriage is far from a raging success not because people are expected to be with one person for the rest of their lives, but because people jump in with both feet and expect marriage to be easy and perfect.  The point of marrying someone is to build a life with that person that is founded on communication and trust.  When you marry someone, you do have to realize that (gasp), you will be sleeping with that person for the rest of your life.  Oh wait...my bad...that IS the contract you enter into when you get married, isn't it?  I see no courage about looking beyond your life partner for a dose of sex from someone else, I see that as cowardice.  When you enter into a marriage, you are choosing to be with that person, uplift that person, honor that person - so how does "agreed upon" cheating help you achieve that.

 

No matter how much a person says they're "okay" with their spouse having some type of sexual relations with another person, jealousy is not an emotion that can go unfelt forever.  One day, you will see your spouse with someone who is more attractive than you, with better legs than you, with higher breasts and a tighter ass than you, or maybe that person will be more intellectual than you, know more about world policies than you do - and you will begin to feel inferior.  That feeling will slowly mold into jealousy and your trust will be diminished and your marriage will be affected.  So, how is "the NEW monogamy" better than the old?

 

Maybe I am old fashioned, or maybe I'm a prude, but I entered in to marriage with my husband because I WANTED to be with only him for the rest of my life.  I find nothing more exciting or intense than the relationship we share.  Those who seek to redefine monogamy or marriage will end up never having the feelings I have for my husband.  And that is a fact.

Early Wake Up

While laying in bed last night, Patrick suggested that we both get up at the same time in the morning and enjoy 45 minutes of togetherness over breakfast as we start our day. The thought of waking up at 5:15 on purpose was a little tough to swallow, but needless to say, I did it anyway.

We stood around in our pj's, making eggs together and waiting for the coffee to finish brewing. I eagerly downed my coffee as I waited for the burst of caffiene induced energry to wake me up, and I realized that I wasn't even really that tired. His suggestion may just turn into our "early morning" tradition. Our lives have been abnormally crazy these days with all of our extracurricular activities and it's nice to just sit together and enjoy our company before our hectic day begins.

Whatever am I going to do when we leave this billet and he's gone all the time? We're more than 2 years away from that, but I'm sure it will creep up on us fast.

Warm Breezes

The past 5 days have given us a glimpse into summer complete with sunshine, 85 degree temps, and warm breezes from the south.  I can honestly say that I would not trade living down here for anything right now, and although the temps will drop 20 degrees tomorrow, the 5 days of paradise was well worth it.  I was able to drive around town with my windows down, with my flip flops on, as the wind blew tangles in my hair.  My radio blasted 90's music and I sang "The Humpty Dance" at the top of my lungs while sitting at a stop light.  Sometimes it seems as if life cannot get better. 

 

On Friday we went out to dinner at Cheeseburger in Paradise to celebrate Shannon's 28th birfday.  The weather was so nice that they had the garage style doors opened and there was seating on the patio for the first time in months.  The frozen drinks helped to keep me in the "tropical" atmosphere, that is, until my burger came out bleeding all over my bun.  That ruined my appetite and set my stomach up for disaster for the rest of the evening. 

 

Saturday we went to the gym, ran errands, walked the dog, took naps and then went to a BBQ at Marshall and Natalie's.  It was a lot of fun, as usual, and there were more people to meet this time.  Sunday was church and Youth Group by myself since Patrick had duty.

 

Tonight we'll be headed to have Mexican at El Mariachi's so we can sip margaritas on the patio and feast Mexican style while we wait for the temperature to fall back to normal.  What a nice time we had living it up Summer style in the middle of March.

The High Seas...

It's hard to admit this in writing, especially when I know that people can read this particular journal and I'm putting myself out there, but this is my journal, right? I'm gonna write what I want to.

I have become SO consumed with getting pregnant again that it's taken over my life. I have become so bad that I have refrained from shopping (my favorite pastime) because I didn't want to buy anything JUST IN CASE I got pregnant again and couldn't fit into it. I mean, we're talking, I wouldn't buy a BRA because I was afraid I wouldn't fit into it in a few weeks. Well...we see where that attitude has gotten me. I am STILL not pregnant - and I'm tired of living my life around the JUST IN CASE. Is it irony that we try for years to prevent such a thing from happening and when we want it the most, we can't have it? Or is it an odd game our body likes playing with us as a payback for all the years it's been pumped with hormones to PREVENT it from happening? I haven't decided which it is yet.

Nonetheless, I have decided to take back control of my life and focus on something else for a while. This thing I'm going to focus on is our next CARIBBEAN CRUISE! We're going to sail the high seas again in January 2007 for a Western Caribbean cruise on the Explorer of the Seas. I know it seems far away (10 months to be exact), but it gives us plenty of time to pay for the cruise and focus on how much fun we'll have.

Our cruise in 2004 proved to be one of the best times we've had in our marriage. It was JUST US and we were able to do all the things we wanted to do, explore tropical islands, lay in the sun...everything we wanted to do and more. What better way to spend a week with the person you love most in the world? Plus, it's definitely a bonus that for formal night, my honey will wear his Bravo uniform and be the sexiest man on the ship (well, he's the sexiest anyway, but that uniform makes me DROOL).

So, I'm refocusing my life and my time on things in the now and not what COULD happen in the future. I'm pretty proud of myself considering how neurotic I've become with the whole baby thing. This is just the thing I need! TROPICAL PARADISE, HERE WE COME!

Weekend Ramblings...

Why can't the work week go by as fast as the weekend? It seems as if every time a weekend comes around it is gone as fast as it came. This one was no exception, either.

Friday night, Patrick and I had a date night and went out to the movies. We saw "Freedomland" with Samuel Jackson. While it was a decent movie, it left me feeling like there was something missing. I would recommend waiting for DVD for this one.

Saturday the weather turned frigidly cold and wet. Jenn bough tickets for us to see "Rent" in Norfolk for the afternoon performance, so we ventured out in it. Needless to say, it was WELL worth it! We had great seats and both sat in awe as we tried to take everything in. The people who performed had the most amazing, moving voices I have possibly ever heard. I was so excited to be there.

Last night, we went with Jenn and Scott over to Natalie and Marshall's house for dinner/boardgames/cards. It was a lot of fun. Joe and Jen were there with there kids, too, but didn't stay long as everyone had been battling colds all week. We had a good time getting to know Natalie and Marshall and it looks like this will turn into a monthly "Get together" until Jenn and Scott and Joe and Jen move away. At least we're making more friends so we're not completely alone when they move!

Patrick has work off tomorrow while I have to sit at work and bang my head against the keyboard because NO ONE knows we'll be at work tomorrow. UGH!

Be Mine

Alas, it is February 14 again, which means the stores are filled with heart shaped boxes of chocolate, discounts on perfume, exorbitant prices on flowers, and those "last minute" gifts for the husbands that forgot what today is.  Valentines Day, much like Christmas, has been over commercialized and has forced men to run to buy those heart shaped pendants, rings, or earrings for their significant others.  Why is it that we need a national holiday to be forced to remind those we love how much we mean to them?  Thank goodness, I am married to a fantastic man who reminds me every day how much he loves me, and doesn't need a date on a calendar to do so.

 

I, for one, am not into jewelry or expensive gifts -- and I think an anniversary is much more to celebrate than a day that everyone else shares.  I would rather my husband rub my feet while watching TV than bring me some piece of jewelry that 20,000 other women will have.  Thankfully, I have a thoughtful husband who will make me French Toast on a Sunday morning, complete with a glass of Grapefruit juice because he knows it's my favorite - and not because he is forced to compete with the other men on the planet trying to prove their love. 

 

The best Valentine's Day we've had, though, was our first one.  We were broke, engaged, and as completely head over heels for each other as we are now.  Patrick's mom was either out of town, or working, I can't remember, so we had the whole house to ourselves.  Patrick made me a wonderful dinner, and he made a picinic in front of the fireplace.  He brought melted chocolate, whip cream and strawberries for us to "snack" on for dessert.  Of course, this was all supposed to be romantic, but romance was taken over by laughter as we turned the dessert into the chance to have a whip cream and chocolate fight.  We were covered from head to toe and enjoyed every moment of it. 

 

Tonight, we will get our portaits taken for the church directory, and then we will go out to a nice dinner - not because we have to, but because we want to, not because Patrick wants to impress me, but because we both love food so much!  The best thing about this Valentine's Day is that, 6 years later, my husband still gives me butterflies when he looks at me, I still want to spend all of my free time with him, I can't get enough of him and him of me, and that he's the best thing that ever happened to me.  That, to me, is the kind of gift money can't buy, and it's the best gift of all.

Silent Lunch

Picture 200 second graders in a crowded room.  Now, imagine it's lunchtime and all hell has broken loose as children run around, scream, and throw food at each other.  Now, imagine the underpaid, overworked, stressed out staff that has to tolerate this behavior.  What would you do to seize management of the situation?

 

With the amount of disrespect that happens in school, why would a parent ever question the reason for a "Silent Lunch" to gain control over unruly students?  The consequence fits the crime - you act civil while in the building eating or you will be punished by having to sit with your head down.  Plain and simple.  There is no corporal punishment.  There is no humiliation. 

 

So, where is the harm in giving a punishment for those who choose to break the rules?  You'd bet your ass that if my child acted like a monkey during lunch, or at any other point in time, I would be more than happy for you to punish my kid, especially with something as minimal as a silent lunch.

 

This used to happen to us in school all the time.  Recess would be taken away if we acted up.  We'd have to keep our heads down while other classes would participate in school functions.  It taught us that if we didn't act right, we'd be in trouble.  And we wonder why, as a society, our children are becoming more badly behaved by each year.  We wonder why we have no control over our kids as we sit by and let them run rampant over any ounce of respect we ever hoped of teaching them.

 

There isn't enough cause and effect punishment in today's world.  The longer we "baby" our children and let them get away with misbehaving without reprimand, the longer we'll have to deal with generations of thankless, rude, and unruly people -- who will someday rule this world.  Scary, isn't it?

Horsin' Around

We spent the weekend in Thurmond, NC visiting with Patrick's Aunt Elaine who was there visiting her dear friend, Audrey. Audrey and Aunt Elaine have known each other just about 60 years and have the unfortunate tragedy of becoming widows this past fall...within weeks of each other. Audrey told Aunt Elaine to invite us down so we could see her, so we made the 5.5 hour trek to spend the weekend on the farm with them.

We had such a good time catching up with Aunt Elaine, who we haven't seen since our wedding day 5.5 years ago! This is an amazing woman, she has been through so much adversity in her life, yet she still shines like the sun. It's amazing how resilient we humans are - in the face of tragedy we can still perservere and make it through. We still get up every day, brush our teeth, get dressed and keep breathing. She is a true testament to the human spirit.

Besides the awesome candle sale we went to (at the candle factory where I got 100 candles for $60!) the best part of the weekend was my very own, private riding lesson from Audrey. I've been on a horse twice before for trail rides, but the instructors/guides never spent more than 3 minutes explaining how to handle the horse and I would cry tears of complete fear when the horse did anything more than a "mosey". I have always loved horses and knew if I got the chance to learn more about them I would be good with them.

Audrey said I was a "natural" in the saddle and that my posture was that of someone who had been riding all their lives. I rode Raisin around the house several times while I learned how to properly hold the reigns and direct her which way I wanted to go. Each time we got behind the house where Audrey could no longer see, Raisin took it upon herself to go into a trot -- but I didn't panic. I calmly made her stop so we could continue on without incident. I had such an amazing time on that horse, and Audrey has invited us down for more riding lessons whenever we want. This weekend made us decide that our retirement will be planned with horses in mind.

The weekend and the visit were much too short, but it was exciting to be with Aunt Elaine nonetheless. Hopefully, we can get to Kansas City sometime soon so that we can spend some more time with her - and not let 5.5 years pass before we see each other again!

Suds and Studs...

Why is it that laundry never seems to get done? I can spend a whole day washing, drying, folding and putting away clothes for TWO people, and the next day there is still a mound of clothing waiting to be washed? How can two people wear so many clothes? I have a work outfit and a home outfit (which can either be jeans and a tee for going out, or comfy pants and a tee for staying in). I don't wash things that aren't dirty. I just don't understand how it happens.

This weekend went by a lot faster than I wanted. Friday night, Jenn and I had a great night out. We did girl things and stayed out "late" talking the night away at Starbucks. (Late for us is 11 since both of us are usually fast asleep by 10 most nights). I have found such a great friend in her and it is going to be TOUGH when she leaves me in a few months. But -- I'm not going to think about that now.

My studly man and I spent the weekend running errands and being lazy on the couch. It was much fun, and went by too fast as usual. Here we are on Monday morning again and I can't wait for 5 to be here so I can cuddle with him on the couch again. You must be thinking that we're pathetic - and you may be right - but this is pure heaven to me.

It's been a while since I've sat down to update this thing, so I'm taking the opportunity now while the house is empty and clean.

The last few months have been utterly exhausting. Between the car accident and the event that followed, the move, Christmas shopping, Christmas parties, home to Detroit for the Holidays, and work we've had no time to sit and relax. However, with the help of Jacob and Shane, we managed to plan a "Guys Weekend" for the boys back at the farm to surprise Patrick. He arrived Thursday night and will be home later today. I wanted to do something special for him since he took such good care of me during the miscarriage, and since his best friends are all in Michigan, this was the perfect way for him to relax.

I took some time to relax and pamper myself this weekend, too, so I wasn't completely alone. I went to dinner and a movie with Jenn and Jen on Friday (saw "Rumor Has It" - pretty cute). Yesterday I treated myself to a manicure and a new haircut, which turned out great (and I pray that I can recreate the same style today!), went shopping and found some GREAT deals on new clothes for myself. Last night I went with the Dawsons and their families for a bowling party for Ryan, and I picked up sushi on the way home to enjoy on the couch. Today I'm finishing the laundry and meeting Chris and Lindsay for football at McFaddens. So, see, I'm not completely lonely!

This past week was a big one for me at work. After 2 months of studying and passing various modules, I have become an Accredited Customer Service Representative. This designation took hours and hours of study time and gives me a title to boast about. Thankfully, I can take this with me when we move and it will help me incredibly when getting my next job.

That's pretty much it for now. Patrick will be home later and I'm sure he'll be exhausted since he and the boys did nothing but party this weekend, but it's all worth it just to see him smile.

Obsessive

Have you ever become so obsessed with one certain thing in your life that you can't seem to get out from under it?  On top of being impatient I have discovered recently that when I find one certain thing to fixate on, I literally become obsessed with it until it is resolved. 

 

Take, for instance, my inability to cope with my toe nails being uneven.  Seriously.  If I see or feel that one side of my toe nail is higher or lower than the other I will pick at it until I have either a) given myself an ingrown toenail or b) end up cutting too much of the nail off and then have to cut the rest of my nails because they won't look right.  See...this is obsessive behavior.

 

This type of fault runs in my family, too.  For example, my sister used to sit on the sink for hours in front of the mirror so that she could pluck her eyebrows.  The girl didn't just do it once in a while, she did this every day.  She was so obsessed that she ended up with the thinnest line of eyebrow you had ever seen.  See again...obsessive behavior. 

 

It's apparent that in life we must learn to let things go that are not of importance, but sometimes it's hard to not obsess over the things that seem most important to you.  Like the thought of the weekend coming.  ;) 

Recent Events...

Patrick and Cameron


Us and The Colliaus


ALMOST all my cousins...but not quite...


Me and Cameron


Trying to remember "Cat's Cradle" with my sister


Christmas Morning

Impatience

I have come to the realization that I am quite possibly the most impatient person on the face of the planet.  I can't get through sitting at a red light to turn left (stupidest thing here in Virginia) without huffing and puffing at least once.  I can't get through standing in the "express" checkout line (and I use that term very loosely) without shifting my weight and rolling my eyes within the first 3 minutes.  I have resorted to swearing and gritting my teeth every time I'm stuck behind someone slow on the interstate.

 

I don't know how this condition came about, or how long I've been this way, but no matter how hard I try I can't seem to fight it.  I think it began in New York where there was a two lane highway in and out of the Hamptons and the roads were cluttered with "citidiots" from May 1 - November 1 every year.  A normal hour drive to get to Wal-mart would span about two hours during those months.  Our favorite hometown delis and restaurants would be overpacked with rude city people who expected you to bow to them because of their vast wealth.  Working in Customer Service was enough to cause an ulcer (which it did) with the rude way people spoke to you. 

 

"Patience is a virtue" is how the old saying goes, but I think that virtue managed to pass me up.  Sometimes waiting is pure agony, other times its just an incovenience.  At this point in time it's agonizing to wait for anything. 

 

I wonder if there's a pill for this condition?  Seems as if there's a pill for everything these days...

Christmas Traditions

Yesterday, I received an email "survey" from Shannon where all of the questions were regarding the holidays.  I am one of those nerds who loves to fill them out and forward them on regardless of who likes them and who hates them, which is probably why the answer to everyone's "Who is most likely to respond?" is always "Leah". 

 

Nonetheless, I enjoyed this particular survey because it kicked my Christmas spirit in gear.  I listed my favorite tradition as us waking Mom and Dad up at the butt crack of dawn, and holding hands, eyes closed, to go out to our stockings.  However, when I read Mom's answers, I was reminded of the tradition that trumps my answer.  The tradition of Dad reading "'Twas the Night Before Christmas" on Christmas Eve.

 

I don't know how or when this tradition started, but every year after we left the Labadie gathering, we would all pile on Dad's lap in the Big Red Chair while he read the story of Santa's visit.  I never knew it during my childhood, but most every year during the reading, my father was tore up from the floor up.  We never noticed the slurred words or the mistakes in the story, it was enough for us kids to just be there in the moment enjoying family time.  There were years when Moe would stay with us and she'd be squeezed up there, too.  Even as the "little" kids got bigger, we'd all sit there, and Mom would pray that the arms of the chair would not break off.

 

During Christmas break in my first year of college was the first year we heard the story after Dad became sober.  He fought his demons earlier that year and quit drinking, and that was present enough for all of us.  I will never forget being 18 years old, in college, and anxiously waiting for him to read that story to us.  The story never changed from year to year, but that year was special.  He did his best "Merry Christmas to all and to all a good night!", and it was as sweet as music. 

 

A few years later, I was a married woman and the tradition continued on without me, until Dad passed away.  Being across the country, Patrick and I had to start our own Christmas Eve traditions which have included a romantic dinner at home prepared by Patrick (Chicken Marsala has been on the menu a few times)a bottle of champagne, and if he has anything to say about it, opening presents. 

 

Christmas at home will be hard this year because it will be my first at home, without my Daddy there.  It's been easy to *not* deal with the holidays and him being gone since we've not been around, but this year will be a hard one.  I will be surrounded by extended family and close friends, but nothing will fill the void of not having Christmas Eve readings on Daddy's lap. 

Gosh, I'm a lucky girl to get to wake up next to him for the rest of my life. ;)

I'll be home for the holidays

T-minus 4 days and counting...

 

Somewhere around 9 am Saturday morning we will be stuffed to the brim with luggage, making our merry way to D-town for Christmas.  Hopefully the sound of Christmas music will drown out the annoying whines of the dog, who can't stand to be in the back seat while we're up front.  If the weather holds out, we'll arrive in Hudson, OH Saturday evening to spend the night and pick up Grammy, and we'll arrive in good ol' Detroit on Sunday morning. 

 

Going home is always fun, but remarkably stressful at the same time.  Everyone expects you to come and see them, spend time with them, while you're there.  For years we've split up the minute we get into town so Patrick could spend time with his Mom and I could spend time with mine.  We thought, at the time, that this was the easiest way to deal with our situations...but we have found that to be wrong.  So, this time, we will be sticking together and trying to spend equal time with families and friends and it ain't gonna be easy.  We should have been doing this all along, but you live and you learn.  This is our vacation and holiday and I hate the fact that we always miss out on spending time with each other. 

 

On a lighter note, it turns out that Uncle Pat, Aunt Neil, Uncle Marty, Aunt Cheryl, Emily Jade and Ian Lawrence will be in town for Christmas this year, too, as well as Aunt Kathy, Uncle Tom, Bridget, Moe-Moe and Colleen.  It'll be the first time we'll be together in a very long time.  The only people who won't be there (that I know of) are Stick and Amy, and Tommy.  So, the Labadie clan will be in (almost) full force this year.  I'm beyond excited.

 

This trip should be fun, and I can't wait to see the look on Cameron's face when he opens his gifts! 

 

 

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Reposted - Monday December 12, 2005

 

Today turned out to be the best day I've had in quite a while.  With the stresses of the last month, miscarriage and moving included, I've felt rundown, sad and tired.  All of these are to be expected; however, nothing seemed to get my spirits up and keep them there. 

 

This morning, I took and passed the 3rd module in the Accredited Customer Service Representative designation I've been working towards.  The best part was that I passed it with a 90%!  I swore I was going to bomb this test, but apparently my study skills have improved since college -- that and I know my job better than I thought I did.  Two more tests and I'm designated!  :)

 

Then, to top the day off, we won the Travelers Sales promotion and each of us got $200 in gift cards to spend at the mall -- and two hours off to do it!  Talk about shopping till you drop!  My kicks were on fire, but I got a lot done.  I picked up gifts for Mom, Cameron, Sandy, Grandpa and Dora, McKynzi, Doug and Patrick.  I am a sales fiend!  Most of those are gifts I wouldn't have been able to afford otherwise, considering the fact that we're "move poor" right now.  There is NOTHING like free money and Christmas shopping.  I'm so excited, I may give Patrick his gifts early!

 

To end the night, we get to go have dinner with Roger and Tasha, and we get to see their beautiful kids -- newest included!  I've desperately needed a day like this, and feel like things will be turning up now. 

 

The best part is that there's only a week until I'm home - and almost all my cousins, aunts and uncles will be there!

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