Friends

In a time when you need them most, friends always come through. I finally got to sit down and talk to Ava last night about everything that's happened recently. She suffered a miscarriage earlier this year and it was nice to know that what I'm feeling right now is normal. The good news is that she is now 4 months pregnant and doing a-okay, so that gives us some hope.

It's sad that we can relate to such a horrible experience, since I wouldn't wish this on even my worst enemy. Every day is a new day and while it still sucks to feel like this, time does heal the wounds. There are times during the day that I'll get lost in thought and need to shake myself out of it. I don't want to let this go, but I don't want to dwell on it either. I don't want to wake up 3 years from now and realize that I'm not over it and it's affected my whole life.

I know it's hard for someone who has never been pregnant to comprehend, but I felt an instant connection with that little life inside me. I would have done anything to protect it. Now, as Kim put it, that baby is up in heaven with our Dad's and they are giving it the best care imaginable. That's the image I'll keep in my heart to get me through this.