Not Your Average Party Girl

This weekend has been pretty boring, despite my apparent breakdown on Friday (see below). I hit Wally World yesterday morning, bought crap & got the oil changed on my car. The Code-ster and I sat around watching Lifetime movies all day and on the commercials I'd run and clean out the closet. I feel much better having gotten it done especially because I've been procrastating for weeks. (I still have yet to file away all the paperwork in the office, but at least we know where it is). I got take out last night and spent another lonely evening with the dog. I think Cody is tired of me talking to him, because now he's just flat out ignoring me. I call his name and I swear he goes into the other room so as to avoid yet another one sided conversation with "crazy woman".

Today was a pretty productive day. The "Forty Days of Purpose" campaign started at church this morning, and I found myself there alone...but I did surprisingly well with it. I believe that there was a reason for Patrick to have been gone so that I would *have* to be faced with taking this first step on my own. I went because I wanted to and not because he wanted me to be there. Our small discussion group is comprised of 3 guys from the softball team that we already knew, so my comfort level automatically increased. I signed the contract to stay committed to this, and I will. I need to find the purpose of me being on this earth -- and I'm convinced it wasn't to sell insurance.

I finished the housework today and rewarded myself by going out to have sushi with Chris, Lindsay and Erin. It was great to get out of the house and have adult interaction...moreso, it was nice to have someone reciprocate the conversaion. Cody has not mastered the English language as yet. They talked about their night out on Friday and how everyone was "wasted". I'm glad I missed out on that one, to be honest.

I've never been a party girl, though I made a few half-assed attempts at it in college. I don't like losing control of my actions and my mouth because I felt like being drunk. I don't like having a hangover, wasting a whole day feeling sick and not being able to remember the night before. I feel like a three headed monster when all the people we know say "Oh man...I was so wasted last night" because I don't get it. Once in a great while, I'll get drunk...but I'm not out to do it every weekend, especially since I come from a long line of alcoholics. I mean, I'm talking Great Wall of China long. I refuse to be a recovering alcoholic someday, or worse...never be in recovery. So, I'll sit my happy ass at home and miss out on all the "fun" and be content with my life the way it is.