My mom finally made it here for Christmas on Wednesday. We picked her up from the airport with Brady in tow and he ran right up to her as if he had seen her every day for the last 13 months of his life. We had an eventful few days, complete with our own "Mini-Katrina" as she called it, which left me up to mid-thigh in water trying to cross the street to get to my car, which was also under water. This after spending three and a half hours at the Health Dept (yuck!) signing us up for WIC and watching pretty much no one do their jobs, but I digress.
We are currently playing tourists in New Orleans and spent the day walking up and down Bourbon Street and around The French Quarter. Of course, the touristy part of New Orleans has reopened, but driving into town was severely depressing. I could see run down, dilapidated houses with the Emergency Services "X" still on the outside, identifying whether or not there were any bodies found in the home after the floods. It's amazing to me how people can bypass this tragedy on the way into town and then walk the streets as if nothing ever happened.
Mom and Patrick are currently out bar hopping and I'm playing the responsible mother who stays with her kid as he sleeps. I am curiously wondering what kind of trouble those two could stir up down there, especially after spending an hour in a bar with my Mom this afternoon and watching her get picked up by a random guy in a Santa hat who wanted to "show her the town"...uh, I think NOT. I begged Patrick not to end up in jail tonight and to keep a watchful eye on my Mother.
Speaking of my Mother, it was quite hysterical to watch Ms. Republican Conservative herself walk all up and down Bourbon Street exclaiming "This is SO cool," and then looking around to see everything from Frozen Daiquiri bars, to tourist shops, to Larry Flint's Huslter Club and Larry Flint's Barely Legal. I about had a heart attack when we passed the first "strip club" which had nude photos of women on the outside, but the real kicker was the place that actually posted pictures of LIVE sexual acts that had taken place in their club. I begged Patrick to put a blanket over Brady in the stroller while we passed such places, but I guess that's the reason New Orleans doesn't dote itself as a family vacation place.
We head home tomorrow and I have to finish my wrapping and get ready for a fantastic Christmas morning! I can't wait!
Sunday, December 23, 2007
Sunday, December 16, 2007
Life as it is...
I can't help but cheese from ear to ear when I look at this picture. I think it's impossible not to look at this face and think to myself "Life as it is, is totally perfect". I couldn't ask for anything more and I honestly cannont remember what my life was like before I got to look at that fantastically beautiful face every day.
Life as I know it has become completely colorful with this walking, talking little man in the house. Suddenly, after he mastered the art of walking, his vocabulary burst wide open. He can tell you he's "done", he can point and tell you when there's a "tuck" driving by, he loves to show you "flowflows" (flowers), he can't wait to eat "din-din", he can even say "puh-puh" (please) when you ask him to. Beyond that he can tell you what a dog, cow, birdie & duck say -- and he loves to walk around trying to find "DAD!". He can show you where "up" is and can turn lights "off" too. He is just a smart smart kid.
He is keeping me on my toes at every turn, too, constantly getting into something -- everything, that is. He wants to help cook dinner, loves brushing his teeth and will almost always be in the kitchen pulling out his tupperware. He also loves pushing the buttons on the TV, which he's being scolded for at every turn! Just last weekend, he picked up the telephone, put it backwards to his ear (number pad in his palm) and started talking jibberish to no one on the other end. I wondered if this was a good thing, considering his Mother loves to talk so much!
I consider myself to be the luckiest person alive to be his mom. I never want to be without him, I can't wait to walk in his room in the mornings and see him smile and say "HI!" to me. I am not one of those Moms who constantly needs "a break" from her kid because this kid is my LIFE. And life is better because he loves me.
I am just so blessed to have such a fantastic family to be with every day of my life. Life as it is, is perfect.
Tuesday, December 04, 2007
Lawn Chairs and Wine
Well, we have officially made it to the south. The deep south. Or is it the dirrty south? I'm not quite sure. Mobile, AL is now "home" for the next couple of years, and after the nightmare of a PCS we just went through, we had better be here for the entire time we're scheduled.
We are currently sitting in the new house sans any furniture or belongings. Well, that is unless you count the lawn chairs provided to us by our fantastic new neighbor so that we no longer have to sit on the floor. Our household goods (HHG) will arrive tomorrow after being kept hostage by the military for over a week since we ordered them delivered. I guess "hostage" is a little rough, but I don't know what else to call it when your belongings are in the same city as you are, being kept in a warehouse and you can't get them until SOMEONE else can bring them to you -- leaving you to sleep on a borrowed airmattress, and eat nothing but microwaveable dinners. Lesson #1 - Always do a door to door move so your stuff doesn't have to go into storage. AKA: Don't get orders and have to move less than 4 weeks later, preventing you from househunting before reporting.
The car will SUPPOSEDLY be delivered today, but I am not holding my breath. The company has jerked us around and lied to us for over 2 weeks, and because of those lies our $200 tiny Christmas budget was spent on a brand spankin new uniform so that Patrick could report to work today. (His uniforms are in the car that was to be delivered LAST week.) Lesson #2 - Always bring uniforms in vehicle you drive in. AKA: Don't ever use Dash Auto Movers Network to ship your car.
Mobile is actually a pretty decent place. The people are friendly, everything you need is here, and the weather is actually tolerable right now. We have had 2 thunderstorms since arriving and I knew that was my sign from God that this will be a good place for the next few years. Once our house is in order and I can get back into a routine, Brady and I will be joining playgroups and whatnot.
But for now, I enjoy the echoing of an empty house from my borrowed lawn chairs, and drink my wine from the glasses left behind by the previous tenants. I guess sometimes we have to find the silver lining in the little things, don't we?
We are currently sitting in the new house sans any furniture or belongings. Well, that is unless you count the lawn chairs provided to us by our fantastic new neighbor so that we no longer have to sit on the floor. Our household goods (HHG) will arrive tomorrow after being kept hostage by the military for over a week since we ordered them delivered. I guess "hostage" is a little rough, but I don't know what else to call it when your belongings are in the same city as you are, being kept in a warehouse and you can't get them until SOMEONE else can bring them to you -- leaving you to sleep on a borrowed airmattress, and eat nothing but microwaveable dinners. Lesson #1 - Always do a door to door move so your stuff doesn't have to go into storage. AKA: Don't get orders and have to move less than 4 weeks later, preventing you from househunting before reporting.
The car will SUPPOSEDLY be delivered today, but I am not holding my breath. The company has jerked us around and lied to us for over 2 weeks, and because of those lies our $200 tiny Christmas budget was spent on a brand spankin new uniform so that Patrick could report to work today. (His uniforms are in the car that was to be delivered LAST week.) Lesson #2 - Always bring uniforms in vehicle you drive in. AKA: Don't ever use Dash Auto Movers Network to ship your car.
Mobile is actually a pretty decent place. The people are friendly, everything you need is here, and the weather is actually tolerable right now. We have had 2 thunderstorms since arriving and I knew that was my sign from God that this will be a good place for the next few years. Once our house is in order and I can get back into a routine, Brady and I will be joining playgroups and whatnot.
But for now, I enjoy the echoing of an empty house from my borrowed lawn chairs, and drink my wine from the glasses left behind by the previous tenants. I guess sometimes we have to find the silver lining in the little things, don't we?
Thursday, October 11, 2007
Invoice, Please!
Almost two years ago now my handyman Uncle Ray decided to help my Mom by redoing her kitchen for her. She refinanced her mortgage and put the new kitchen in to add value to her home. My uncle is fantastic with his hands and enjoys woodwork, capentry and remodeling. He was a full time Detective Sargent at the time and told my Mom that he would not charge her for the labor, that she just had to buy all the materials. He worked at his own pace and did an OUTSTANDING job. I was so excited for my Mom because this was something she had always wanted to do, but my Dad was the anti-Handyman. So, with Uncle Ray's help she got the kitchen she wanted, and we couldn't have been more thankful.
Recently, my sister moved back home to finish out her last year of school. She brought her cat along with her, who Cody mostly wanted to chase. So Mom decided to put new doors on the bedrooms to ensure that Cody couldn't get in and Bella couldn't get out when no one was home. She asked Uncle Ray for his help putting the new doors up, and he agreed. He apparently took a couple days to do it, but the end result was a safer cat and a less full dog.
Suddenly, yesterday, my Aunt Laurie drops an envelope on Mom's desk at work. Inside it was an invoice for Uncle Ray's costs for hanging the doors. On it was the price of the doors, which was expected, along with his own LABOR COSTS for hanging them. He took the time to point out to her that he graciously discounted his cost and said he would have charged "someone else" a higher price. Just so that you are clear, reader, the man never charged her for all the labor he did on the kitchen and he also never ONCE discussed LABOR COSTS prior to him hanging the doors. This was all out of the blue. So, not only did this cost my Mom twice the amount of money, but she was never given the opportunity to get other price quotes from other "handymen" prior to having the work done. Doesn't seem fair, does it?
My Mom is an educated consumer. She shops around to find a good deal and doesn't just throw money around that she doesn't have. The woman is a WIDOW who works three jobs to make ends meet. My Aunt and Uncle take expensive vacations 2 -3 times per year, and have never had to know the pain of not knowing whether you'll make ends meet. My Mom doesn't GET luxurious trips, great clothes or expensive household items. She busts ass to make her mortgage payment to keep her roof over her head. Also, my Mom has provided YEARS of free services to their animals - clipping nails, expressing glands, training advice - and never once did it cross her mind to send them an invoice for her time because you don't do that to family.
I am so angry about this whole situation that I could spit. I wear my heart on my sleeve and my family is the MOST important thing to me. Mom said she is going to pay it and just move on, but I have half a mind to call him up and ask him where the hell he gets off. Honestly, I am not saying that his time isn't worth money, because I know it is. My problem is with the fact that my Mom was never given the courtesy that a normal consumer would have been given, and therefore was treated with disrespect by her own family member. She doesn't want to talk about it but I know that she's hurt that he would treat her this way and her own sister would be in on it. If there were going to be charges for labor, they should have been discussed beforehand.
I just don't understand how the hell people can be so insensitive. It's not about the money, it's about treating your family with more respect than you would "Joe Schmoe". This is the final straw for me and in the future I'll be sure to keep my distance so that I don't tell him exactly where to get off.
Now, I wonder if he'll start charging Grammy for all the things she has him do for her...
Recently, my sister moved back home to finish out her last year of school. She brought her cat along with her, who Cody mostly wanted to chase. So Mom decided to put new doors on the bedrooms to ensure that Cody couldn't get in and Bella couldn't get out when no one was home. She asked Uncle Ray for his help putting the new doors up, and he agreed. He apparently took a couple days to do it, but the end result was a safer cat and a less full dog.
Suddenly, yesterday, my Aunt Laurie drops an envelope on Mom's desk at work. Inside it was an invoice for Uncle Ray's costs for hanging the doors. On it was the price of the doors, which was expected, along with his own LABOR COSTS for hanging them. He took the time to point out to her that he graciously discounted his cost and said he would have charged "someone else" a higher price. Just so that you are clear, reader, the man never charged her for all the labor he did on the kitchen and he also never ONCE discussed LABOR COSTS prior to him hanging the doors. This was all out of the blue. So, not only did this cost my Mom twice the amount of money, but she was never given the opportunity to get other price quotes from other "handymen" prior to having the work done. Doesn't seem fair, does it?
My Mom is an educated consumer. She shops around to find a good deal and doesn't just throw money around that she doesn't have. The woman is a WIDOW who works three jobs to make ends meet. My Aunt and Uncle take expensive vacations 2 -3 times per year, and have never had to know the pain of not knowing whether you'll make ends meet. My Mom doesn't GET luxurious trips, great clothes or expensive household items. She busts ass to make her mortgage payment to keep her roof over her head. Also, my Mom has provided YEARS of free services to their animals - clipping nails, expressing glands, training advice - and never once did it cross her mind to send them an invoice for her time because you don't do that to family.
I am so angry about this whole situation that I could spit. I wear my heart on my sleeve and my family is the MOST important thing to me. Mom said she is going to pay it and just move on, but I have half a mind to call him up and ask him where the hell he gets off. Honestly, I am not saying that his time isn't worth money, because I know it is. My problem is with the fact that my Mom was never given the courtesy that a normal consumer would have been given, and therefore was treated with disrespect by her own family member. She doesn't want to talk about it but I know that she's hurt that he would treat her this way and her own sister would be in on it. If there were going to be charges for labor, they should have been discussed beforehand.
I just don't understand how the hell people can be so insensitive. It's not about the money, it's about treating your family with more respect than you would "Joe Schmoe". This is the final straw for me and in the future I'll be sure to keep my distance so that I don't tell him exactly where to get off.
Now, I wonder if he'll start charging Grammy for all the things she has him do for her...
Tuesday, October 09, 2007
The Brave Face
I recently wrote about how our life is up in the air because Patrick disenrolled from his class last week, and how we're just waiting to find out what the deal is with the Coast Guard about where we are going to go and when. Last week I was okay about the whole situation, really I was, but I am ready to admit that I am currently freaking out.
I consider myself to be a a level headed, fair minded person, especially when it comes to my family. I don't like change, per say, but when we have to make decisions I always let my heart guide me and support whatever it is Patrick wants to do. I have put on my brave face for the past week and supported him in this decision because HE really felt like it was the right one. Today, I am on the verge of tears and have bit off all my nails as I try to wait patiently to learn our "fate".
The fact of the matter is that I don't want to move right now. The thought of having to get ready for another move makes me sick to my stomach. I mean, we honestly JUST got here. We've not even been here 7 months yet and I'm already preparing to have to do it again. I don't want to have to pack and unpack again. I don't want to live out of a suitcase for days or weeks on end. I don't want to disrupt the life or schedule I have for Brady. I don't want to have to miss his birthday party or Christmas with my Mom because we might have to move. I just want things to be status quo for a while.
This is my moment of selfishness and I think I deserve it. I would never tell Patrick how scared I am because I KNOW how hard this was for him. I just have to sit here on pins and needles waiting for the phone to ring and hope that good news is on the other end.
::Running to put brave face back on::
I consider myself to be a a level headed, fair minded person, especially when it comes to my family. I don't like change, per say, but when we have to make decisions I always let my heart guide me and support whatever it is Patrick wants to do. I have put on my brave face for the past week and supported him in this decision because HE really felt like it was the right one. Today, I am on the verge of tears and have bit off all my nails as I try to wait patiently to learn our "fate".
The fact of the matter is that I don't want to move right now. The thought of having to get ready for another move makes me sick to my stomach. I mean, we honestly JUST got here. We've not even been here 7 months yet and I'm already preparing to have to do it again. I don't want to have to pack and unpack again. I don't want to live out of a suitcase for days or weeks on end. I don't want to disrupt the life or schedule I have for Brady. I don't want to have to miss his birthday party or Christmas with my Mom because we might have to move. I just want things to be status quo for a while.
This is my moment of selfishness and I think I deserve it. I would never tell Patrick how scared I am because I KNOW how hard this was for him. I just have to sit here on pins and needles waiting for the phone to ring and hope that good news is on the other end.
::Running to put brave face back on::
Thursday, October 04, 2007
Misinformation
So, today I am feeling like a total idiot of a mother. I know I am not stupid because I have done a really good job with him, but for those things that I don't know I have relied on asking my pediatricians for direction.
At Brady's 9 month appoinment (late in August), his doctor told me that by the time he was 12 months and came back that he needed to be off the bottle and eating mostly table food. At 12 months he can have regular cow's milk instead. She said to drop his bottles one at a time over the next few months. So, I did just that a couple weeks ago, dropping his late afternoon bottle and decreasing the amount of formula he takes in by about 7 oz (big number).
I didn't realize it, but around that same time, Brady's napping got all out of whack. He went from talking himself to sleep to screaming. I haven't been able to figure out why until another mother pointed out to me that he is likely not getting enough formula (nutrition) and is hungry and pissed off. The stupid idiot that I am just thought the doc meant get rid of the formula AND the bottle, but apparently I must be a mindreader because she never said aloud that I needed to still feed him that forumla, just switch it to a cup.
My blog today isn't about how stupid I feel (although, I truly do), it is about how I have yet to find a decent doctor out here in California. EVERYONE is so rushed and overwhelmed that the Well Baby Checkup is over before it starts. I can't get a doctor to return my calls. I can't get a doctor to answer my questions. And I guess I can't rely on the information they give me unless I force them to stay in the room and explain it the way it's meant to be taken. Doesn't anyone care anymore? Dr. Stacy in Virginia was the only doctor who took any time to care about our child - and us. Why can't everyone be like her?
This country is so fouled up with it's healthcare that it's unreal.
At Brady's 9 month appoinment (late in August), his doctor told me that by the time he was 12 months and came back that he needed to be off the bottle and eating mostly table food. At 12 months he can have regular cow's milk instead. She said to drop his bottles one at a time over the next few months. So, I did just that a couple weeks ago, dropping his late afternoon bottle and decreasing the amount of formula he takes in by about 7 oz (big number).
I didn't realize it, but around that same time, Brady's napping got all out of whack. He went from talking himself to sleep to screaming. I haven't been able to figure out why until another mother pointed out to me that he is likely not getting enough formula (nutrition) and is hungry and pissed off. The stupid idiot that I am just thought the doc meant get rid of the formula AND the bottle, but apparently I must be a mindreader because she never said aloud that I needed to still feed him that forumla, just switch it to a cup.
My blog today isn't about how stupid I feel (although, I truly do), it is about how I have yet to find a decent doctor out here in California. EVERYONE is so rushed and overwhelmed that the Well Baby Checkup is over before it starts. I can't get a doctor to return my calls. I can't get a doctor to answer my questions. And I guess I can't rely on the information they give me unless I force them to stay in the room and explain it the way it's meant to be taken. Doesn't anyone care anymore? Dr. Stacy in Virginia was the only doctor who took any time to care about our child - and us. Why can't everyone be like her?
This country is so fouled up with it's healthcare that it's unreal.
Wednesday, October 03, 2007
State of Limbo
Just when I think that I am settled and accepting life the way it is, some kind of wrench is thrown at me and I'm forced to change my view of the future. Mother Teresa once said "I know God only gives us as much as we can handle, I just wish he didn't trust me so much."
Patrick told me on Monday that he was certain that he couldn't go on in this class anymore. Things had become overwhelming for him and he felt as though if he were sent to a boat on his own that he was totally unprepared. The pace of this class was so fast and he was not getting enough time to retain and practice the information given before he had to move on to something else. He told me honestly, "I am just not ready for this".
He has been told by several of the Chiefs at the school that he IS meant for this job, but he needs more experience in the field before he can complete this course. He is the youngest in the class, has been in the military the least amount of time, and only had 2 years experience as a Corpsman prior to starting this class. The Navy guys all have been Corpsmen for at least 5 years and in the military for 8 or more. They even told him at the beginning that this was going to be especially tough on him since he lacked the experience of the others. He has done well on all his exams but the school fails to let you practice one thing before you move on to another, and he is very much a hands on learner.
I applaud my husband's courage to take this step and handle the consequences from the Coast Guard, if there should be any. He knows he isn't ready and doesn't want to jeopardize his future shipmates or the ship in general. He wants to be totally confident in his job ability before taking the step to be the only medical person in charge of 100+ people. God knows that he is good at what he does, but he just needs more experience at this time.
So, now our life is in limbo while we wait to see where the Coast Guard will send us. He will stay here in San Diego for the time being and work at the Sector until the Detailer can put him someplace else. I'm not sure what I'm hoping for, but I want him to be in a place where he can continue to hone his skills and prepare him for the future. Brady and I will have to deal with the rest.
Sometimes life changes daily, but we have to roll with the punches to keep up with the flow. :)
Patrick told me on Monday that he was certain that he couldn't go on in this class anymore. Things had become overwhelming for him and he felt as though if he were sent to a boat on his own that he was totally unprepared. The pace of this class was so fast and he was not getting enough time to retain and practice the information given before he had to move on to something else. He told me honestly, "I am just not ready for this".
He has been told by several of the Chiefs at the school that he IS meant for this job, but he needs more experience in the field before he can complete this course. He is the youngest in the class, has been in the military the least amount of time, and only had 2 years experience as a Corpsman prior to starting this class. The Navy guys all have been Corpsmen for at least 5 years and in the military for 8 or more. They even told him at the beginning that this was going to be especially tough on him since he lacked the experience of the others. He has done well on all his exams but the school fails to let you practice one thing before you move on to another, and he is very much a hands on learner.
I applaud my husband's courage to take this step and handle the consequences from the Coast Guard, if there should be any. He knows he isn't ready and doesn't want to jeopardize his future shipmates or the ship in general. He wants to be totally confident in his job ability before taking the step to be the only medical person in charge of 100+ people. God knows that he is good at what he does, but he just needs more experience at this time.
So, now our life is in limbo while we wait to see where the Coast Guard will send us. He will stay here in San Diego for the time being and work at the Sector until the Detailer can put him someplace else. I'm not sure what I'm hoping for, but I want him to be in a place where he can continue to hone his skills and prepare him for the future. Brady and I will have to deal with the rest.
Sometimes life changes daily, but we have to roll with the punches to keep up with the flow. :)
Saturday, September 15, 2007
The Exception
We have embarked on a new phase of parenthood recently. Brady, who is 10 months on Monday, has been mobile for 2.5 months and just last week he took his first steps. He is getting more ambitious with every day. He sees something and he tries to walk to it, usually only a step or two, but he is learning very quickly that he must step OUT as opposed to forward in order to keep his balance. The kid will be off and running in a matter of weeks and I will have even less rest than I do now, not that I mind.
Along with the ability to move comes curiosity and getting into everything. We have started to "discipline" Brady even though he doesn't really have the capacity to retain what we've told him. We figure that it's better to keep ourselves in line with what the rules are so that as he ages he can learn easily and we don't have to struggle to break bad habits. None of our rules are harsh, we just don't want him standing up in the tub, pulling on the blinds or banging on glass with toys. Typical boundaries, we think.
From reading endless "Mommy Message Boards", I have learned that Patrick and I are the exception in our parenting style which I think will prove difficult especially in later years. Unlike other babies his age, Brady doesn't have a "favorite show" to base his first birthday party theme on because we never have the TV on for him. Sure, we'll watch the news or keep an eye on the game, but we don't sit Brady in front of the TV to mesmerize him because we feel it's OUR job to teach him. He is perfectly content playing with his own toys or getting into the plastic bowls in the kitchen. He would much rather be outside watching the planes fly by than sitting in front of a TV show for entertainment. The "rule" seems to be that most parents let their 10 month olds sit in front of the TV for hours on end while they do other "important" things...although I'm not sure what could be more important than interacting with and teaching your child.
I am SURE that Brady will be interested in TV shows in a few years, and I am SURE that Patrick and I will have restrictions on the amount of time he watches them. I don't mean to profess that Brady will never watch TV, we just don't think that there's anything he could learn from "The Backyardigans" (what?) or Barney that we couldn't teach him better at this age.
I have a feeling that Brady will one day want to know why he isn't allowed to eat McDonald's four times a week, or play video games all day, but I hope that with our being involved in his life he will never feel like he is being "left out" of anything. My child is my most important job and I feel if that makes me the exception, than that's okay by me.
Along with the ability to move comes curiosity and getting into everything. We have started to "discipline" Brady even though he doesn't really have the capacity to retain what we've told him. We figure that it's better to keep ourselves in line with what the rules are so that as he ages he can learn easily and we don't have to struggle to break bad habits. None of our rules are harsh, we just don't want him standing up in the tub, pulling on the blinds or banging on glass with toys. Typical boundaries, we think.
From reading endless "Mommy Message Boards", I have learned that Patrick and I are the exception in our parenting style which I think will prove difficult especially in later years. Unlike other babies his age, Brady doesn't have a "favorite show" to base his first birthday party theme on because we never have the TV on for him. Sure, we'll watch the news or keep an eye on the game, but we don't sit Brady in front of the TV to mesmerize him because we feel it's OUR job to teach him. He is perfectly content playing with his own toys or getting into the plastic bowls in the kitchen. He would much rather be outside watching the planes fly by than sitting in front of a TV show for entertainment. The "rule" seems to be that most parents let their 10 month olds sit in front of the TV for hours on end while they do other "important" things...although I'm not sure what could be more important than interacting with and teaching your child.
I am SURE that Brady will be interested in TV shows in a few years, and I am SURE that Patrick and I will have restrictions on the amount of time he watches them. I don't mean to profess that Brady will never watch TV, we just don't think that there's anything he could learn from "The Backyardigans" (what?) or Barney that we couldn't teach him better at this age.
I have a feeling that Brady will one day want to know why he isn't allowed to eat McDonald's four times a week, or play video games all day, but I hope that with our being involved in his life he will never feel like he is being "left out" of anything. My child is my most important job and I feel if that makes me the exception, than that's okay by me.
Thursday, September 06, 2007
Home is...
Early on in my 'career' of being a military spouse, I learned a few key phrases that I need to live by in order to make it through realizing that my life is not of my control. Along with "Semper Gumby - Always Flexible" the rule of thumb is that "Home is where the Coast Guard sends you." Fortunately, I have had the blessing of being with my husband a lot of the time, and we have been to some pretty cool places, but I also learned that life is what you make of it, and I refuse to be held down because of misery.
We submitted our list of "picks" back in July for our next station. The choices were limited to 4 for the four Coasties currently in training for Independent Duty Corpsman with the Navy. The list of choices was not even CLOSE to what we were hoping for, but we sucked it up, put our ranking together and sent it off with fingers crossed and prayers sent up. Guam and Alaska were two of the choices and completely not ideal, but we did our research just in case we were sent to one of these places.
We learned late yesterday that it is looking more and more like we are headed to Key West, FL, which was our number one choice. Our friends, Jess and Joe, found out that they are 'slated' to be sent to Alaska, which was last on their list. Jess is taking this news very hard and is extremely upset at the prospect of having to live there, especially because there is 6 months of pure daylight 24 hours, and 6 months of pure darkness. I can't say I'd be happy at the thought of that either.
I keep trying to tell Jess that this isn't the end of the world, but she honestly believes it is. I tell her that her main priority is making a healthy, stable and happy life for Lexi wherever they are sent, but right now I can't get her to see that. I know the news is devastating to her, but I'm not sure how to get her past all of the negative things she's feeling without her thinking I'm not being sincere.
I can't say I'm sad that it wasn't us that got Alaska. Honestly, I had even resigned myself to thinking we were actually going there, so I armed myself with information and knowledge so I could make the time there enjoyable. I hope that Jess can get over this news quickly and find the good in all of it. The silver lining in her cloud is that this particular boat Joe would be at doesn't go out as much as the one in Key West does, so they can be a family more.
Life honestly and truly is what you make of it. If you succumb to misery, your life, and everyone in it, will be miserable. I refuse to let that happen to my family. Semper Gumby!!
We submitted our list of "picks" back in July for our next station. The choices were limited to 4 for the four Coasties currently in training for Independent Duty Corpsman with the Navy. The list of choices was not even CLOSE to what we were hoping for, but we sucked it up, put our ranking together and sent it off with fingers crossed and prayers sent up. Guam and Alaska were two of the choices and completely not ideal, but we did our research just in case we were sent to one of these places.
We learned late yesterday that it is looking more and more like we are headed to Key West, FL, which was our number one choice. Our friends, Jess and Joe, found out that they are 'slated' to be sent to Alaska, which was last on their list. Jess is taking this news very hard and is extremely upset at the prospect of having to live there, especially because there is 6 months of pure daylight 24 hours, and 6 months of pure darkness. I can't say I'd be happy at the thought of that either.
I keep trying to tell Jess that this isn't the end of the world, but she honestly believes it is. I tell her that her main priority is making a healthy, stable and happy life for Lexi wherever they are sent, but right now I can't get her to see that. I know the news is devastating to her, but I'm not sure how to get her past all of the negative things she's feeling without her thinking I'm not being sincere.
I can't say I'm sad that it wasn't us that got Alaska. Honestly, I had even resigned myself to thinking we were actually going there, so I armed myself with information and knowledge so I could make the time there enjoyable. I hope that Jess can get over this news quickly and find the good in all of it. The silver lining in her cloud is that this particular boat Joe would be at doesn't go out as much as the one in Key West does, so they can be a family more.
Life honestly and truly is what you make of it. If you succumb to misery, your life, and everyone in it, will be miserable. I refuse to let that happen to my family. Semper Gumby!!
Saturday, August 18, 2007
Time just seems to fly...
We are in our final hours of our trip to Detroit and it never ceases to amaze me how unbelievably sad I get when a visit is coming to a close. Spending all this time with my family has made me calmer, more together and relaxed. I am dreading heading back to California where there is no Mom or Sarah or Doug or Tanya to keep me laughing and decompressed. I am extremely excited to see Patrick, but my days will again be lonely when he's at school and it's just Brady to keep me entertained.
I tried desperately hard to see everyone I could while I was here, but time didn't allow for everyone. I got a text message from Lynn yesterday that said "If I were in Cali I would be trying to see you. The last few times you were in MI my feelings have been hurt." The funny thing is that I let her know in May that I was coming, I texted her before I left AND while I was here to tell her I was around, but it remains MY fault in her eyes that we didn't see each other. I am the person who has to see about 8 million people during my visits (the number has increased significantly since Brady is now in the picture) but it's one ME to ensure I see her when she could have just as easily called me to get together. I am not shifting the blame onto her, but honestly, I did my part and she did nothing.
I guess next time I will need a longer visit to fulfill my obligations and try to relax a bit.
I tried desperately hard to see everyone I could while I was here, but time didn't allow for everyone. I got a text message from Lynn yesterday that said "If I were in Cali I would be trying to see you. The last few times you were in MI my feelings have been hurt." The funny thing is that I let her know in May that I was coming, I texted her before I left AND while I was here to tell her I was around, but it remains MY fault in her eyes that we didn't see each other. I am the person who has to see about 8 million people during my visits (the number has increased significantly since Brady is now in the picture) but it's one ME to ensure I see her when she could have just as easily called me to get together. I am not shifting the blame onto her, but honestly, I did my part and she did nothing.
I guess next time I will need a longer visit to fulfill my obligations and try to relax a bit.
Tuesday, July 03, 2007
Yucky, Eewy, Digustin
I guess I have already started using childlike phrases for my child who isn't even 8 months yet. If he reaches for the dirty diaper during a change I'll tell him, "No, Brady, that's YUCKY." Or, if he burps or farts on me I'll exclaim "That's DIGUSTIN" (my Mommy word). I think it's fun and he always seems to get a kick out of the way I say things rather than the words themselves.
Somehow or another, we got some "yuckiness" into our house recently. Fleas. Yes, fleas. Tell me how that's even possible when we don't have an animal living with us. Even when Cody lived with us he never had them and I was never covered from head to toe with bites and scars from scratching. I am MISERABLE. I am highly allergic to their bites and have done nothing but scratch myself raw for weeks now, and have been forced into wearing jeans to cover the ugliness that is now my legs. I had the "bug man" come out over a week ago to spray and the biting let up for a few days, but it seems as if new eggs quickly hatched and they were back to feasting on my flesh. I am pretty sure they're coming from my neighbor's house into my house somehow because she has them running rampant in her house and hasn't done anything about them. YUCK.
On a side note unrelated to yuckiness, I am gearing up for our trip to Detroit in a few weeks. I have been searching the internet relentlessly to find tips on flying with an infant. I went ahead and spent an extra $300 to get Brady his own seat since the flight is 4.5 hours long and I'll be with him alone. I am hoping this was a good decision! I know that I will have to be totally "un-Leah" during the flying days and just be patient and relaxed. I am bound to misplace something, Brady is bound to cry, I am bound to need a whole bottle of wine upon landing in Detroit and back in LA.
I am looking very forward to being with my family for so long and having playdates with Noelle and Jaycie. I am also looking very forward to having a bit of help! Things have been really good here for the last couple of months but I am going to enjoy giving him to Grammy and enjoying a night or two out with "the girls".
Somehow or another, we got some "yuckiness" into our house recently. Fleas. Yes, fleas. Tell me how that's even possible when we don't have an animal living with us. Even when Cody lived with us he never had them and I was never covered from head to toe with bites and scars from scratching. I am MISERABLE. I am highly allergic to their bites and have done nothing but scratch myself raw for weeks now, and have been forced into wearing jeans to cover the ugliness that is now my legs. I had the "bug man" come out over a week ago to spray and the biting let up for a few days, but it seems as if new eggs quickly hatched and they were back to feasting on my flesh. I am pretty sure they're coming from my neighbor's house into my house somehow because she has them running rampant in her house and hasn't done anything about them. YUCK.
On a side note unrelated to yuckiness, I am gearing up for our trip to Detroit in a few weeks. I have been searching the internet relentlessly to find tips on flying with an infant. I went ahead and spent an extra $300 to get Brady his own seat since the flight is 4.5 hours long and I'll be with him alone. I am hoping this was a good decision! I know that I will have to be totally "un-Leah" during the flying days and just be patient and relaxed. I am bound to misplace something, Brady is bound to cry, I am bound to need a whole bottle of wine upon landing in Detroit and back in LA.
I am looking very forward to being with my family for so long and having playdates with Noelle and Jaycie. I am also looking very forward to having a bit of help! Things have been really good here for the last couple of months but I am going to enjoy giving him to Grammy and enjoying a night or two out with "the girls".
Wednesday, June 27, 2007
Shaq's Big Challenge
I am not usually one for reality TV shows - especially the crappy ones about dating or other nonsense - but last night I got sucked right into "Shaq's Big Challenge" when we were flipping through the channels before bed. I hadn't seen many commercials about it and really had a feeling it would mostly be about Shaq (who I am not a big fan of), but I was really wrong.
This was almost horrifying to watch. The kids on this show were not just overweight, they were classified as Morbidly Obese by weight standards. Every single one of these pre-teens and teens weighed more than I do - and I'm a grown woman who is nearly 6 feet tall. None of them could do sit ups and push ups, and they all failed the Presidential Fitness Test they were given.
The saddest part of the whole thing was that it seemed as if their parents were totally clueless as to the condition of their child or how they got there. One mother even said "I feel like I am partially to blame for this". No, seriously?? You must be kidding. You are not partially to blame, lady, you are fully to blame. Your 13 year old daughter doesn't have the money, the car, or the skills to get her own groceries -- she depends on you to do that. So, how is it that you're only PARTIALLY to blame? You bring the junk into the house, you fill her up on fast food and pizza on a daily basis because you're too "tired" or "overworked" to get a decent, healthy meal on the table. You let her sit on her butt after school and don't encourage her to exercise. This isn't just partially your fault, honey, it's all your fault.
I understand that some children have a predisposition to being heavier because of their genes, and I understand that today's society doesn't allow our kids to be able to play outside all day and only come home for meals, but that doesn't mean that there isn't anything we can do as parents. The thought of letting Brady out of my sight for hours on end and chance it that a serial killer/child molester/pervert would get a hold of him scares me to death - but I won't let him stay inside his whole life. He'll be enrolled in sports, we'll go to the park, we'll kick the soccer ball around the yard. He will NOT be sentenced to a life at home playing video games because I'm too scared of what will happen to him.
Speaking of the video games, the boy named Walter on the show was the perfect poster child for what's wrong with this country. The kid spends 5 hours PER DAY playing video games, in a recliner, 3 feet from his TV. He is socially stunted for a 15 year old and had the maturity level and social skills of a 7 year old. I had always known I didn't want to have video consoles be a babysitter for my kid - and now I'm seriously considering throwing whatever XBOX thing Patrick has out in the trash (he hasn't played it in almost a year anyway!). I will be like my cousin, Todd, and his wife and just plain not allow my kids to play video or computer games.
Before last night I really had an aversion to Shaq because I feel like he gets away with a lot of crap in the NBA due to his size, but I have a newfound respect for him for wanting to take this on. Childhood obesity is not just a problem, it's an epidemic in this country. I really believe that there is no more personal responsibility left in the world and parents feel like they can just do the minimal when it comes to their children, and when there's an issue, it's everyone else's fault.
I refuse to let that happen to my child - and I wish more people cared like Shaq to help stop this form of child abuse.
This was almost horrifying to watch. The kids on this show were not just overweight, they were classified as Morbidly Obese by weight standards. Every single one of these pre-teens and teens weighed more than I do - and I'm a grown woman who is nearly 6 feet tall. None of them could do sit ups and push ups, and they all failed the Presidential Fitness Test they were given.
The saddest part of the whole thing was that it seemed as if their parents were totally clueless as to the condition of their child or how they got there. One mother even said "I feel like I am partially to blame for this". No, seriously?? You must be kidding. You are not partially to blame, lady, you are fully to blame. Your 13 year old daughter doesn't have the money, the car, or the skills to get her own groceries -- she depends on you to do that. So, how is it that you're only PARTIALLY to blame? You bring the junk into the house, you fill her up on fast food and pizza on a daily basis because you're too "tired" or "overworked" to get a decent, healthy meal on the table. You let her sit on her butt after school and don't encourage her to exercise. This isn't just partially your fault, honey, it's all your fault.
I understand that some children have a predisposition to being heavier because of their genes, and I understand that today's society doesn't allow our kids to be able to play outside all day and only come home for meals, but that doesn't mean that there isn't anything we can do as parents. The thought of letting Brady out of my sight for hours on end and chance it that a serial killer/child molester/pervert would get a hold of him scares me to death - but I won't let him stay inside his whole life. He'll be enrolled in sports, we'll go to the park, we'll kick the soccer ball around the yard. He will NOT be sentenced to a life at home playing video games because I'm too scared of what will happen to him.
Speaking of the video games, the boy named Walter on the show was the perfect poster child for what's wrong with this country. The kid spends 5 hours PER DAY playing video games, in a recliner, 3 feet from his TV. He is socially stunted for a 15 year old and had the maturity level and social skills of a 7 year old. I had always known I didn't want to have video consoles be a babysitter for my kid - and now I'm seriously considering throwing whatever XBOX thing Patrick has out in the trash (he hasn't played it in almost a year anyway!). I will be like my cousin, Todd, and his wife and just plain not allow my kids to play video or computer games.
Before last night I really had an aversion to Shaq because I feel like he gets away with a lot of crap in the NBA due to his size, but I have a newfound respect for him for wanting to take this on. Childhood obesity is not just a problem, it's an epidemic in this country. I really believe that there is no more personal responsibility left in the world and parents feel like they can just do the minimal when it comes to their children, and when there's an issue, it's everyone else's fault.
I refuse to let that happen to my child - and I wish more people cared like Shaq to help stop this form of child abuse.
Monday, June 04, 2007
Teething Bites
I once saw a bib in Babies R Us that read that very statement.
I was pleasantly plump and pregnant at the time, took one glance, laughed, and walked away. I never knew that the silly statement on that bib would become the title of my life as it currently stands.
Brady is now cutting his 6th tooth, which is also known as tooth number 4 in three weeks. He does not seem to be handling these teeth as well as the others and his usual laughter and babbling has been replaced with incessant whining and humming. According to my mother, who has been through this three times, the humming vibration helps his gums. This is quite possibly the only thing that helps him right now because Tylenol, teething tablets, cold washcloths, frozen toys, and Orajel don't seem to be doing a damn thing.
He is currently refusing to nap, most likely because the pain in his gums keeps him from peaceful sleep during the day. I should be careful not to complain, because he does still sleep his regular 12 hours at night, so at least we have been good there. For the last 10 days, he has taken nothing but 30 - 40 minute naps, which means when he goes down I must rush to shower and dress before he wakes up -- or stuff my lunch in my mouth and throw a load of laundry in before he wants out of his crib.
I am beginning to think that I am being punished for something I did as a teenager. It would make perfect sense - payback for the crap I did to my parents is having a 6 month old teethe constantly for a month straight, right. What I can't figure out yet is whether or not this is payback for one certain thing I did, or my teen years as a whole. I'm hoping it's cumulative payback because if it's for only one thing, I hate to see what my other paybacks are going to be.
In some better news, Patrick finally made 2nd Class Petty Officer on Friday and I was there to pin his "crows" on. The best part of that whole thing is MO' MONEY! :) Also, my very own pat on the back is that I am now back in my size 6 jeans and I am SUPER happy. It only took 6 months...sheesh.
I was pleasantly plump and pregnant at the time, took one glance, laughed, and walked away. I never knew that the silly statement on that bib would become the title of my life as it currently stands.
Brady is now cutting his 6th tooth, which is also known as tooth number 4 in three weeks. He does not seem to be handling these teeth as well as the others and his usual laughter and babbling has been replaced with incessant whining and humming. According to my mother, who has been through this three times, the humming vibration helps his gums. This is quite possibly the only thing that helps him right now because Tylenol, teething tablets, cold washcloths, frozen toys, and Orajel don't seem to be doing a damn thing.
He is currently refusing to nap, most likely because the pain in his gums keeps him from peaceful sleep during the day. I should be careful not to complain, because he does still sleep his regular 12 hours at night, so at least we have been good there. For the last 10 days, he has taken nothing but 30 - 40 minute naps, which means when he goes down I must rush to shower and dress before he wakes up -- or stuff my lunch in my mouth and throw a load of laundry in before he wants out of his crib.
I am beginning to think that I am being punished for something I did as a teenager. It would make perfect sense - payback for the crap I did to my parents is having a 6 month old teethe constantly for a month straight, right. What I can't figure out yet is whether or not this is payback for one certain thing I did, or my teen years as a whole. I'm hoping it's cumulative payback because if it's for only one thing, I hate to see what my other paybacks are going to be.
In some better news, Patrick finally made 2nd Class Petty Officer on Friday and I was there to pin his "crows" on. The best part of that whole thing is MO' MONEY! :) Also, my very own pat on the back is that I am now back in my size 6 jeans and I am SUPER happy. It only took 6 months...sheesh.
Wednesday, May 09, 2007
Homesick
Over the last six and a half years I have had a few bouts of homesickness after visits from relatives or trips back to Detroit. They always lasted a day or two, but I quickly got back into my routine and my own life and the feelings subsided. I have always missed our friends and family, but it was easy to enjoy new places and friends because the phone kept me in step with everyone back in Michigan. I know that living away from everyone will always bring on some sort of feeling like we are missing out, but I haven't ever felt the gut wrenching, heartbreaking homesickness I've been having the last few days.
I should have known that when Sarah came to visit it was going to turn out like this. Having her here with me for over a week was so fantastic and we had such a great time. I knew that as the week was drawing to a close I would have a hard time saying good bye, but I never imagined that I would feel so empty after she left. I watched her cry as she kissed Brady before we left and I felt like the cruelest person for keeping him from her by living so far away. For the first time since we left almost seven years ago the guilt became so crushing that I had to fight back my tears because I knew I would lose it.
I told Mom that I have never felt so awful in all my life, and that I had always missed them, but having Brady made it much harder to deal with. I feel like he is missing out on so much. I feel like WE are missing out on so much. Everyday he hangs out with me, he sees me, he loves me...but if we were closer to home he would be able to see his Grandmothers, Aunts, Uncle and cousins on a consistent basis. He would be able to get to know them and do special things with them. What I wouldn't give for a Sunday dinner with the family.
I honestly don't know how long this feeling is going to last, but I'm pretty sure it's going to be here for a while. I came home from the airport and told Patrick that we were moving back to Detroit. He could become a firefighter and I could stay home with the kids, and we could be happy with our family around. I told him that I just couldn't take this anymore and I wanted to go home. Of course, he knew I was blowing off steam, but the majority of my heart knows that I was serious.
Everyday is supposed to be easier, and yet it's not. I hope this bout of homesickness subsides quickly.
I should have known that when Sarah came to visit it was going to turn out like this. Having her here with me for over a week was so fantastic and we had such a great time. I knew that as the week was drawing to a close I would have a hard time saying good bye, but I never imagined that I would feel so empty after she left. I watched her cry as she kissed Brady before we left and I felt like the cruelest person for keeping him from her by living so far away. For the first time since we left almost seven years ago the guilt became so crushing that I had to fight back my tears because I knew I would lose it.
I told Mom that I have never felt so awful in all my life, and that I had always missed them, but having Brady made it much harder to deal with. I feel like he is missing out on so much. I feel like WE are missing out on so much. Everyday he hangs out with me, he sees me, he loves me...but if we were closer to home he would be able to see his Grandmothers, Aunts, Uncle and cousins on a consistent basis. He would be able to get to know them and do special things with them. What I wouldn't give for a Sunday dinner with the family.
I honestly don't know how long this feeling is going to last, but I'm pretty sure it's going to be here for a while. I came home from the airport and told Patrick that we were moving back to Detroit. He could become a firefighter and I could stay home with the kids, and we could be happy with our family around. I told him that I just couldn't take this anymore and I wanted to go home. Of course, he knew I was blowing off steam, but the majority of my heart knows that I was serious.
Everyday is supposed to be easier, and yet it's not. I hope this bout of homesickness subsides quickly.
Tuesday, April 24, 2007
The SAHM
Years ago the thought of giving up my career to stay at home with my kids made me chuckle. I couldn't possibly sacrifice my paycheck and nice lifestyle to be covered in spit up and pureed carrots on a daily basis, could I? Even though I fell into Insurance on a whim, I was still proud of all I had accomplished in my short time in the industry, and thought for sure that I would be the kind of mother who needed to work outside the home to feel like I was contributing to my family's future. Society's view of a stay at home mom is a bleak one, anyway. Add in the preconceived notions of a military spouse and, BAM, you have a recipe for people to instantly turn down their noses at you.
I did return to work for a short time after Brady was born. He was about 7 weeks old and I went back to help my department transition because we were moving away and a new agent would be taking my spot. The morning Brady left with Patrick to go to the sitter's house, I cried my eyes out. It was the first time I had been away from him and my heart broke into a million pieces as the door closed behind them. I got ready for work and returned to my desk that day as only a body. My heart and soul were with that baby across town, and it was all I could do to keep myself from crying all day. I even stuck one of his teeny, tiny socks in my pocket so I could rub it when I started to feel sad. It was in those moments that I knew I had been wrong for all those years.
You cannot always tell what your future holds, but when your ideas about life change, you roll with the punches. I couldn't be a happier person now that I have a short, bald guy for a boss. Sure, I'm not bringing in a paycheck or solving insurance problems anymore, but I'm doing something much more important. I am raising my son. Me. I get to see him smile all day. I get to make him laugh hysterically when he's tickled. I get to watch in amazement as he tries to crawl before my very eyes, and I get the complete satisfaction of knowing that I will never regret this decision.
So, society may not yet accept a woman who "sacrifices" herself to raise her family, but I know full well that tomorrow, when that precious baby wakes up, my life is completely perfect and I am right where I want to be.
I did return to work for a short time after Brady was born. He was about 7 weeks old and I went back to help my department transition because we were moving away and a new agent would be taking my spot. The morning Brady left with Patrick to go to the sitter's house, I cried my eyes out. It was the first time I had been away from him and my heart broke into a million pieces as the door closed behind them. I got ready for work and returned to my desk that day as only a body. My heart and soul were with that baby across town, and it was all I could do to keep myself from crying all day. I even stuck one of his teeny, tiny socks in my pocket so I could rub it when I started to feel sad. It was in those moments that I knew I had been wrong for all those years.
You cannot always tell what your future holds, but when your ideas about life change, you roll with the punches. I couldn't be a happier person now that I have a short, bald guy for a boss. Sure, I'm not bringing in a paycheck or solving insurance problems anymore, but I'm doing something much more important. I am raising my son. Me. I get to see him smile all day. I get to make him laugh hysterically when he's tickled. I get to watch in amazement as he tries to crawl before my very eyes, and I get the complete satisfaction of knowing that I will never regret this decision.
So, society may not yet accept a woman who "sacrifices" herself to raise her family, but I know full well that tomorrow, when that precious baby wakes up, my life is completely perfect and I am right where I want to be.
Wednesday, March 28, 2007
Settling In
We have finally made it and settled into our home in San Diego. There are a few loose ends to tie up with organizing the house, but for the most part we are unpacked. The trip was an "uneventful eventful" ride. Turns out that Brady HATES the car. Scratch that. He DESPISES the car. He screamed most of the way from Virginia to San Diego, which wore our nerves out tremendously. My precious, beautiful angel was a screaming devil child in the car.
At first I tried desperately to calm him - signing, toys, DVD's, silence. Nothing worked. Nothing even made a dent in his attempts to scream his guts out. Finally, after days of endless screaming the whole time he was awake, and futile attempts to calm him, I finally gave up and let him cry. I had to laugh while he was doing it because otherwise I would have gone stark raving mad.
I searched endlessy for reasons that he would be so upset. Was his seat belt too tight? Was his car seat loose? Was he sick? I worried myself to death with what could possibly be wrong with him until I noticed a pattern. When the little bugger would hear the seatbelt unclicking, or feel the carseat lifitng off the base, he was INSTANTLY a better baby. He went from lunatic to angel baby in a matter of nanoseconds when he was out of the car. The conclusion was that he just flat out hates the car. Unfortunately, I'm told this goes on for months and months at a time. I am dreading leaving the house.
Along with the unpacking, for the last week we have tried to get Brady into a routine - something he is not used to. With the routine came the unwanted sleeping in his crib, in his own room. It has been a plight to get him to nap or sleep at night on his own, and we have spent countless, endless hours trying to get him back to sleep. The vicous cycle continued daily when he wouldn't sleep enough during the day, and even less at night.
Ultimately, we have broken down and tried the approach we never thought we'd try - crying until he puts himself to sleep. Thankfully, it is not a horrid as it sounds. Noelle gave me the name of a program that several of her girlfriends tried and swear by. "The Sensible Sleep Program" helps you understand that it is your job as a parent to help your child learn how to sleep on his/her own. You do not have to close the child in the room and wait while he screams himself to sleep, you can be in the room with him to give him support and loving touches while he figures this all out. It was hard, but he fell asleep after only 28 minutes of crying. He woke up again 32 minutes later, but put himself to sleep on his own (I was in the room) in 18 minutes. Again, he woke up after about a half hour, but it only took him 5 minutes to fall asleep again.
I feel this method is "humane" and I can honestly say I feel empowered already by giving him the tools he needs to sleep on his own. I mean, come on, who really wants to have to rock a 25 pound 2 year old to sleep?
Speaking of size, Brady had his 4 month appointment on Friday and he continues to grow very well. He's 24 inches and 14 pounds. He falls within the 25% percentile, but the doctor said he's doing very, very well.
I am off to put myself to sleep and pray that the learning of sleep habits doesn't take more than a few nights to teach.
At first I tried desperately to calm him - signing, toys, DVD's, silence. Nothing worked. Nothing even made a dent in his attempts to scream his guts out. Finally, after days of endless screaming the whole time he was awake, and futile attempts to calm him, I finally gave up and let him cry. I had to laugh while he was doing it because otherwise I would have gone stark raving mad.
I searched endlessy for reasons that he would be so upset. Was his seat belt too tight? Was his car seat loose? Was he sick? I worried myself to death with what could possibly be wrong with him until I noticed a pattern. When the little bugger would hear the seatbelt unclicking, or feel the carseat lifitng off the base, he was INSTANTLY a better baby. He went from lunatic to angel baby in a matter of nanoseconds when he was out of the car. The conclusion was that he just flat out hates the car. Unfortunately, I'm told this goes on for months and months at a time. I am dreading leaving the house.
Along with the unpacking, for the last week we have tried to get Brady into a routine - something he is not used to. With the routine came the unwanted sleeping in his crib, in his own room. It has been a plight to get him to nap or sleep at night on his own, and we have spent countless, endless hours trying to get him back to sleep. The vicous cycle continued daily when he wouldn't sleep enough during the day, and even less at night.
Ultimately, we have broken down and tried the approach we never thought we'd try - crying until he puts himself to sleep. Thankfully, it is not a horrid as it sounds. Noelle gave me the name of a program that several of her girlfriends tried and swear by. "The Sensible Sleep Program" helps you understand that it is your job as a parent to help your child learn how to sleep on his/her own. You do not have to close the child in the room and wait while he screams himself to sleep, you can be in the room with him to give him support and loving touches while he figures this all out. It was hard, but he fell asleep after only 28 minutes of crying. He woke up again 32 minutes later, but put himself to sleep on his own (I was in the room) in 18 minutes. Again, he woke up after about a half hour, but it only took him 5 minutes to fall asleep again.
I feel this method is "humane" and I can honestly say I feel empowered already by giving him the tools he needs to sleep on his own. I mean, come on, who really wants to have to rock a 25 pound 2 year old to sleep?
Speaking of size, Brady had his 4 month appointment on Friday and he continues to grow very well. He's 24 inches and 14 pounds. He falls within the 25% percentile, but the doctor said he's doing very, very well.
I am off to put myself to sleep and pray that the learning of sleep habits doesn't take more than a few nights to teach.
Friday, January 26, 2007
I have spent the last two days off from work. The first to take care of my sick little guy (just a cold, no worries), and the second to attend to appointments. One of which was having my temporary crown put in...BLECH. The other was to take Brady to his 2 month appointment. My little man isn't so little anymore. He's weighing in at 11 pounds 3 ounces and is now 22 inches long! That's 5 pounds and 4 inches he's added since birth!
I came into work today to find out that my department had a meeting and I was to be left out of it to answer any client calls that came in. I have officially become the "red-headed step child" of my department. They changed the name on my phone to show up as Heather now (my replacement), they got rid of my business cards on my desk, and I was lucky to even have a desk to come back to since they put Heather here just before my return. I am slowly being erased from my position, and I know I should be happy, but it's not fun to be left out of everything. I'm still here everyday, I still get all my work done, I'm still getting a paycheck, so why is it so hard to still include me in the daily activities?
Patrick is currently headed to MI for the weekend to take Cody to live with my Mom. The poor dog has been severly neglected by me since Brady came, but I couldn't help but bawl my eyes out last night as I said my "goodbye" to him. He's only going to be with her for the time we're in San Diego but for the last 5 years I have rarely ever been away from that dog. He has been the thing that I've come home to for years. He kept me company many lonely nights while Patrick was away. He kept me warm on the cold nights when I had to sleep alone. I know this is the best decision for us, but it's so hard to think about him not being around for a while.
There is still so much to do to get ready for this move and I can barely drum up the energy to do anything. I'm so exhausted I can't keep my eyes open at night. Brady and I are going to relax all weekend long. It's cold out and I don't want to take him anywhere!
22 days until we're out of VA...thank GOD!
I came into work today to find out that my department had a meeting and I was to be left out of it to answer any client calls that came in. I have officially become the "red-headed step child" of my department. They changed the name on my phone to show up as Heather now (my replacement), they got rid of my business cards on my desk, and I was lucky to even have a desk to come back to since they put Heather here just before my return. I am slowly being erased from my position, and I know I should be happy, but it's not fun to be left out of everything. I'm still here everyday, I still get all my work done, I'm still getting a paycheck, so why is it so hard to still include me in the daily activities?
Patrick is currently headed to MI for the weekend to take Cody to live with my Mom. The poor dog has been severly neglected by me since Brady came, but I couldn't help but bawl my eyes out last night as I said my "goodbye" to him. He's only going to be with her for the time we're in San Diego but for the last 5 years I have rarely ever been away from that dog. He has been the thing that I've come home to for years. He kept me company many lonely nights while Patrick was away. He kept me warm on the cold nights when I had to sleep alone. I know this is the best decision for us, but it's so hard to think about him not being around for a while.
There is still so much to do to get ready for this move and I can barely drum up the energy to do anything. I'm so exhausted I can't keep my eyes open at night. Brady and I are going to relax all weekend long. It's cold out and I don't want to take him anywhere!
22 days until we're out of VA...thank GOD!
Wednesday, January 17, 2007
A New Life...
I've been severely lacking in time and opportunity to come and update this blog, which, along with housecleaning, is at the bottom of my list of priorities these days. My precious free time is now reserved for cuddling with my little man after a long day of work.
Since my last post, life has changed dramatically. On November 14th, I woke up feeling a ton of pressure in my "nether regions" and called the doctor to see what was up. They had me come in to monitor me for a little while and found I was still having irregular contractions. The nurse practioner advised that they would be surprised if I made it another week. I then asked her if I should call my Mom to tell her to get here, and she replied "OH YEAH! As soon as possible!".
Mom arrived later that night and we spent the next two days running errands and keeping me off my feet. My doctor appointment on Thursday that week showed that I was still dialating and was 100% effaced. Dr. Cox stripped my membranes to help the process along since I was defintely going soon. By 9:20 the next morning, November 17th, I was having full blown contractions every 4 - 7 minutes. I thought it was strange that I felt them all in my back -- and later learned the true meaning of BACK LABOR.
We arrived at the hospital around noon and I was convinced they were going to send me home. I thought for sure I was going to be that woman that ended up going to L&D 18 times before she really was in labor. After monitoring me for about fifteen minutes, the nurse came in and said, "We're not picking up any ctx on the monitor." I said, "Well, than what am I feeling???" She moved the belt to the other side and continued to monitor me. After another 15 minutes she came in and said "Yup, you're in labor." No kidding, eh?
I made it through the contractions without any drugs for the majority of my labor, but after she broke my water they got much worse. I was drug free for 11 of my 12 hours of labor - which I'll likely never do again! My labor was all in my back and it hurt like nothing I've ever experienced. However, I was able to "enjoy" about 45 minutes of the epidural before I started pushing. After pushing through 4 contractions, a total of 15 minutes, Brady Thomas Coppo was born! They whisked him immediately over to the NICU nurses who were waiting for him, but after checking him out they determined they were not needed. Daddy got to hold him first and then he was given to me. At that moment, I looked into my child's eyes and felt the most intense, deep, and profound love a person could ever imagine.
He weighed in at 6 pounds, 4 ounces and was 18 inches long. He was such a tiny little guy, and I just knew I wanted to hold onto him forever. He was covered in muck, had a mild rash looking thing on his body - but he was the most beautiful thing I had ever laid eyes on. By the time he arrived in our suite that night, he was cleaned up and wide eyed. I spent the first night in the hospital listening to him make the most amazing noises as he slept. I wasn't sure if these were good noises, so I worried at first -- and then when he stopped making them, I worried that something was wrong.
I love being a Mommy, and while the first few weeks were hard (including another hospital stay as a result of him having a choking episode), it has gotten much easier. He now smiles, coos and laughs at me. I stopped breastfeeding because something in my milk was not agreeing with him, and he's been completely happy and content ever since. I don't regret my decision to stop either because I quickly learned that I would sever my arm with a dull knife in order to make this child happy.
So - that's it for now. We have our move quickly approaching, and while I waste time here at work I may be able to update more. As of today I only have 22 days left until work is done (14 actual work days thanks to our trip to NY this weekend).
Since my last post, life has changed dramatically. On November 14th, I woke up feeling a ton of pressure in my "nether regions" and called the doctor to see what was up. They had me come in to monitor me for a little while and found I was still having irregular contractions. The nurse practioner advised that they would be surprised if I made it another week. I then asked her if I should call my Mom to tell her to get here, and she replied "OH YEAH! As soon as possible!".
Mom arrived later that night and we spent the next two days running errands and keeping me off my feet. My doctor appointment on Thursday that week showed that I was still dialating and was 100% effaced. Dr. Cox stripped my membranes to help the process along since I was defintely going soon. By 9:20 the next morning, November 17th, I was having full blown contractions every 4 - 7 minutes. I thought it was strange that I felt them all in my back -- and later learned the true meaning of BACK LABOR.
We arrived at the hospital around noon and I was convinced they were going to send me home. I thought for sure I was going to be that woman that ended up going to L&D 18 times before she really was in labor. After monitoring me for about fifteen minutes, the nurse came in and said, "We're not picking up any ctx on the monitor." I said, "Well, than what am I feeling???" She moved the belt to the other side and continued to monitor me. After another 15 minutes she came in and said "Yup, you're in labor." No kidding, eh?
I made it through the contractions without any drugs for the majority of my labor, but after she broke my water they got much worse. I was drug free for 11 of my 12 hours of labor - which I'll likely never do again! My labor was all in my back and it hurt like nothing I've ever experienced. However, I was able to "enjoy" about 45 minutes of the epidural before I started pushing. After pushing through 4 contractions, a total of 15 minutes, Brady Thomas Coppo was born! They whisked him immediately over to the NICU nurses who were waiting for him, but after checking him out they determined they were not needed. Daddy got to hold him first and then he was given to me. At that moment, I looked into my child's eyes and felt the most intense, deep, and profound love a person could ever imagine.
He weighed in at 6 pounds, 4 ounces and was 18 inches long. He was such a tiny little guy, and I just knew I wanted to hold onto him forever. He was covered in muck, had a mild rash looking thing on his body - but he was the most beautiful thing I had ever laid eyes on. By the time he arrived in our suite that night, he was cleaned up and wide eyed. I spent the first night in the hospital listening to him make the most amazing noises as he slept. I wasn't sure if these were good noises, so I worried at first -- and then when he stopped making them, I worried that something was wrong.
I love being a Mommy, and while the first few weeks were hard (including another hospital stay as a result of him having a choking episode), it has gotten much easier. He now smiles, coos and laughs at me. I stopped breastfeeding because something in my milk was not agreeing with him, and he's been completely happy and content ever since. I don't regret my decision to stop either because I quickly learned that I would sever my arm with a dull knife in order to make this child happy.
So - that's it for now. We have our move quickly approaching, and while I waste time here at work I may be able to update more. As of today I only have 22 days left until work is done (14 actual work days thanks to our trip to NY this weekend).
Thursday, November 09, 2006
Long time...
It's been a long time since I sat down to update this thing - and a lot has changed! For one, we found out a couple weeks ago that we're moving to San Diego this winter so that Patrick can go to a Navy training school for Corpsmen. We'll be leaving VA in February so we can go home for a few weeks with the baby and then make our way cross country with our little squirt in tow. Should be an adventure. I'm really excited because it means I get to stay home with the baby for at least the first year and a half of its life. We're going to have so much fun out there.
In other big news, I managed to find myself in Preterm Labor last week and ended up in the hospital for 3 days. They got my contractions under control, finally, and I'm home on bedrest now. Actually, it's more like couchrest. I'm allowed to go up and down the stairs once a day, make my food, go to the bathroom, but other than that I'm on my back - which is likely how I got in this position in the first place! HA!
I had a doctor's appointment today and found that I'm still 2cm dialated and 50% effaced, but the baby's head is "right there" according to my doc. This means I'm probably going soon, although we don't know when. I was given steroid shots in the hospital to help mature the baby's lungs so if it is born early he or she will be okay. I'm terrified to have an early baby because I don't want it to have to be in the NICU, but I'll take whatever God throws my way.
That's it for now. I'll keep posting as much as I can so I can remember these days down the line. Baby Coppo will be here soon...
33 weeks 3 days
In other big news, I managed to find myself in Preterm Labor last week and ended up in the hospital for 3 days. They got my contractions under control, finally, and I'm home on bedrest now. Actually, it's more like couchrest. I'm allowed to go up and down the stairs once a day, make my food, go to the bathroom, but other than that I'm on my back - which is likely how I got in this position in the first place! HA!
I had a doctor's appointment today and found that I'm still 2cm dialated and 50% effaced, but the baby's head is "right there" according to my doc. This means I'm probably going soon, although we don't know when. I was given steroid shots in the hospital to help mature the baby's lungs so if it is born early he or she will be okay. I'm terrified to have an early baby because I don't want it to have to be in the NICU, but I'll take whatever God throws my way.
That's it for now. I'll keep posting as much as I can so I can remember these days down the line. Baby Coppo will be here soon...
33 weeks 3 days
Thursday, September 28, 2006
The End Is Near
Tuesday marked a very important stage in this pregnancy, at least to me. That night, Patrick and I went to the hospital to have our “New Baby” tour of the Maternity wing. We wandered around wide eyed and excited along with 12 other couples who were to also deliver there.
During the work day I could hardly focus on anything other than the fact that this was happening – and in less than 11 weeks! I stared blankly at the computer screen in front of me and constantly rattled off an internal list of what, exactly, we hadn’t done yet in preparation for this baby. I had several freak out sessions and even had to call my Mom to declare, “Oh my gosh…I’m going to have a baby!” To which she replied, “I’m sorry, is this the FIRST time you’re realizing this?” Yes, I have finally transitioned from just ‘being pregnant’ to ‘holy cow, I’m going to have to push a human being out of my hoo-ha’ and ‘I am going to be completely responsible for another person’s life’. I can honestly tell you that the revelation of these facts is truly wonderful and terrifying all at the same time.
The maternity ward was clean, quiet and comfortable. I’ll labor, deliver and recover all in my own private room, and then afterwards we will move into our own Mother/Baby suite – complete with fold out bed for Daddy to sleep on. The most significant part of the tour for me, besides getting to see the rooms where we’ll be, was finding out about their steps towards the security of the baby. Not only will the baby have two ID bands (one on the leg, one on the wrist), but Patrick and I will also have bands that will be checked to the match the baby every time it is placed with us in the room. On top of that, each baby wears another security band that is hooked up to the central security of the hospital. If a baby crosses certain areas of the floor, an alarm will go off and the entire hospital will shut down, including elevators and doorways. We were told to be “very careful” where we go on the floor so as not to trip the alarm. This brought a sense of relief to most of the mothers there given how many babies have been stolen from hospitals in the last 10 years.
I am in the final weeks of this adventure and everything is becoming more and more real. I believe the “nesting” part has started because all I can think about is getting home to clean my house. I’ve become a clean freak – quite the opposite from lazy Leah. Last night, we went out to Target and used one of our gift cards to purchase sleepers, onesies, and booties for the baby. Patrick proudly held up the booties and said “Can you even believe that its feet are going to be THIS small?”
I hope to never forget how it feels to have this baby move around inside me, kick me, punch me…it’s the most fantastic feeling in the whole world. Even as I sit here I’m being poked and prodded by either a fist or an elbow…I’m not sure which one. This is truly one of the most beautiful blessings God has bestowed on us humans and I’m extremely proud to be a part of the process.
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